Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened.

If ever there is tomorrow when we’re not together.. there is something you must always remember. You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think. But the most important thing is, even if we’re apart.. I’ll always be with you.-- Winnie the Pooh

Claire and Alex left us last week. Rachel and Marina left on Friday. And, this Friday, Freddie, Tori, Methini and moi will be leaving. I will be the last to leave, the final Marmite. (how ironic, I'm listening to the Final Countdown while I write this!!!)

This song brings back soo many memories of me, Freddie and Chantel dancing like loons in the silent disco!! In fact, today I've been remembering lots of the fun times. I started to sort out my room today, and I'm going to have to clear it all out because my brother's getting my room once i've moved out. So i was finding junk that's been hidden for the last ten years and reminising about my time here in Jersey. I found some programs and ticket stubs from Stratford, which brought back memories of both Stratford trips. Freddie dancing to Queen in our room, shopping till we dropped with Claire, going to see Cymbeline, and of course, Freddie almost dying of excitement before The Tempest because of Patrick Stuart!!

I then found photos of the trip to Berlin with Methini and Marina, and I remembered the amazing fun we had. I then thought of Paris in Year 8 and Sri Lanka last year, and I'm thankful that I've had soo many opportunities to go away with my friends.

And there are soo many good memories that I hope I will never forget. And many of them involve Team Marmite. I'd like to add that I coined the name for us, although Freddie tries to take the credit!!

Swimming in our clothes, dancing like an idiot at Jersey Live, (ok, dancing like a loon anytime i drink alcohol), the gigs, the many movie outings, playing 40:40 in the dark, the orange game, beating the crap out of my friends, English lessons, beach times, crazy birthdays, tight tights!!......i could go on forever, there are soo many memories that just make me giggle when i think of them.

So, I just want to say good luck to Marina, Claire, Rachel, Freddie, Tori, Methini and Alex, and thank you so much for being the greatest friends anyone could ever want. I can't wait to see you guys again at Christmas so we can catch up!!

And to answer an earlier post of Freddie's - my eyes are my favourite part of my body. Which is weird cause they never stay open in photos!! Ha ha!! I love my eyes because they're never a definite colour. My mum says they're hazel, I've been told they're green, or brown, or grey. I love my eyes because i can see beautiful things, and my eyes express me too, even when I dont say anything.

Not the best two months of my life....

I was just reading Freddie, Marina and Rachel's blogs and realised that I hadn't written mine in a while. It turns out that i haven't written a post since 29th June!! I can't believe the time has gone so quickly and in next to no time (about 2 weeks) i'll be off to university. Finally, after so many years of waiting to finally become an adult, and move on to a better stage in my life, the time is nearly here. And i can't wait!!

But its not been the best two months of my life. Firstly I didn't get the grades I needed for Exeter or Cardiff and so i went into Clearing. I finally got a place at Sussex and I'm then told I havn't got Halls accommodation and I have to either stay with a host family (er no thanks!) or find private accommodation.

This was truly stressful because not only did i have to find a house to live in but i also had to find housemates. i was let down by quite a few people until i found a group i quite liked. I went to Brighton for the day to meet my potential housemates (5 guys, as yet I was the only girl but we were planning to get some more) and see some house. We eventually found a house we liked, and agreed to rent it. Finally some good news!!

However, yesterday I had some more bad news. For years, I've had very sore wrists, and I've always just thought it was from netball or doing too much writing. It suddenly started hurting really bad about two weeks ago, so I went to the doc and he sent me for an x-ray. I got the results back yesterday and I've got early degenerative arthritis.

FUCK!! I thought only old people could get arthritis!! I couldn't believe it! I was so shocked when he told me, I couldnt quite take it in and I just felt numb! It was only as i was walking to work that it hit me, and I had a little cry. He couldnt tell me how worse it would get and if it would affect me now, or it would only really start to affect me later. I have to see a specialist but as I'm off to uni, that wont be till xmas unless I see someone in the UK.

Then, about two hours later, I got a call from one of my housemates telling me that two other housemates had dropped out, for no apparant reason. Although he was really angry, as he'd already put down a deposit on the house, he told me that already he had other people asking about moving in. At the moment, we've got two more girls moving in so hopefully its now going to be 50/50!

Hopefully things'll start getting better soon because I hate all this bad luck i seem to be having. I'm extra sad because everyone's starting to leave for uni. Claire left yesterday and left a message on my facebook wall which made me cry, especially as i was in a fragile state anyway! Soon other people will be going and then it'll be my turn. Hopefully a new start at university will bring me better luck....

I think I made up from my lack of posts over the last two weeks by writing this extra long one! Its not the happiest of blogs, but hopefully I'll start feeling more positive soon! Today was a good start, with filming Freddie's new video which was actually so much fun, even if it was a little uncomfortable. I think I've decided I dont suit black hair (see below!) Ha ha!